Circumcision is in the news again because two parents in Florida are disagreeing over whether to perform the procedure on their child. From what I can tell, it’s actually just a proxy war and the real issue is how much mom and dad absolutely and utterly hate each other. But plenty of people are getting excited about circumcision once more – particularly in the “manosphere,” where, to a certain breed of men’s rights activist, giving your little one the snip is something akin to rape or female genital mutilation.
These “Intact America” types need to get a grip. Sorry to be a dick, but circumcision is just good grooming. Let’s start with the obvious one: women – and men – prefer it. Figures start at about fifty-fifty: 54 per cent of women say they prefer a circumcised penis, according to a survey of 1,000 women on AdamandEve.com. They go all the way up to four-in-five: 71-83 per cent of women in this Iowa survey said they preferred circumcised.
This shouldn’t be a surprise to us. Circumcision isn’t a recent invention of misandrists, sadists or religious nuts: 15,000 years ago, men realised that making their wieners more attractive improved their chances of oral sex. Perhaps as a gay man I’m biased, but aesthetics matter. And let me tell you – sorry if this veers into “TMI” territory – that I’m infinitely more likely to make you happy down there if you’re cut.